Dejeuner sur l'herbe
Pacific v Bordeaux CC at Lycee de la Sauque  Sun 27-Aug-2006 at 1pm
Won 5 Wickets

XII:- Jon Webley*, Mark Sams+, Peter Hollman, Conrad Chandler, Adam Long, Matt Callender, Matt Patel, James Smith, Kurt Rademaker, Oli Haill, Sammy Purcell & Teddy Heywood.

For four hundred years or so in the Middle Ages, Bordeaux was under the rule of the British after local Duchess Eleanor of Aquitaine wed the man who became King Henry II. And for the initial few overs of Pacificís France Tour 2006 curtain-raiser, length was devotedly married to line and the south-pawed pair of Oli Haill and James Smith reigned over their wine-supping foe.

This was despite the unfriendly bowling terrain, with a considerable crater in the left-armer's run-up at both ends. However, as is often the case, the opening batteurs were content to play it safe until they faced the first change and until then Pacific watched numerous jaffers squeeze past flailing bats. The run rate trickled and fielders were able to appreciate the fragrant outfield, where Pete Hollman's aged olfactory receptors were unable to tell if they were detecting rosemary, mint or lavender.

The first change was the introduction of spinning convert Sammy Purcell, then, earlier than usual, the captain John Webley. As both unfamiliar with bowling to self-protective opening batsmen, they too were unable to break through the Bordeaux defenses. 67-mph Conrad Chandler mixed it up to the delight of his colleagues, but was just as powerless to remove opposing captain Gear and partner Smallwood.

Webley returned the ball to Haill after the hosts had made their ton and were freeing their arms a bit more. Eyeing his personal landmark, Gear attempted a straight six off Haill Ė and it looked to be clearing beefy Queenslander Kurt 'Radio 1093' Rademaker at long-on until a well-timed leap brought his right fingers high enough to wrap themselves around the ball.

Once that breach had been made in the home defenses, others soon followed. Ten balls later, skinny Yorkshireman Adam Long removed the aggressive new batsman before he could make much impact and not long after that wine exporter Neil Vasey was clean bowled by the hot-as-a-flamin'-galah Rademaker. Amidst this excitement, another highlight was Smith's slower ball, delivered as a juicy long hop and dispatched according over the field. Anyway, the Bordeaux innings was wrapped up at 156 up when returning Pacific legend Mark Sams, now a resident of Malaysia, deftly removed the bails of the lingering opening batsman after Purcell turned it past the bat.

After a pleasant dejeuner sur l'herbe, where Pacific's big-hitters reflected that the gnarled old tree growing just inside cow corner provided a good target, especially Chandler who lamented that it blocked off his favourite route to the rope. Webley sent out a bouquet garni of an opening partnership, with Rademaker's zesty power to complement seasoned veteran Hollman's subtle approach. They set off at a brisk enough pace, barbie expert Rademaker was playing as if he had all the thyme in the world, lashing the ball around like special sauce. He fell, bowled for a brisk 43, while his partner was still in the teens.

Webley joined old sage Hollman who, although in no danger of reaching l'arbre, was looking at ease until he was beaten by Bordeaux's pacey youngster. Webley and Long, effective and cultured, drove the score onwards, with Chandler replacing the captain and also contributed a useful score. Callendar did not, however, and it was left to the elegant Purcell to finish the job with a four from one of his soon-to-be-trademark sweeps off off-stump.

WAGs Report

While they were playing, the Pacific team's array of lovely daughters, wives and girlfriends were not caught by the local paparazzi as they sunned themselves silly by the pool. No-one went topless.

Man of the match: Kurt Rademaker for his 'Red Wine Moment' catch, top score and a wicket.

Packing the kit: First duck of the tour and itís the star-gazing Matt Callendar.

Post-match correspondance from Neil Vasey: "Dear Peter, It was a pleasure to have Pacific down in the South-West and it is with no hesitation that I say we'll be delighted to see you in 2008. My best, Neil "

Bordeaux CC v Pacific
Bordeaux CC innings Runs Mins Balls 4s 6s
  Gear c Rademaker b Haill  41  0  0  5  0  
  D Smallwood st Sams b Purcell  69  0  0  6  0  
  Pinsent c Haill b Long  6  0  0  1  0  
  N Vasey b Rademaker  19  0  0  0  0  
  Bradford not out  1  0  0  0  0  
  Snookes did not bat  0  0  0  0  0  
  Adam did not bat  0  0  0  0  0  
  Cierson did not bat  0  0  0  0  0  
  David did not bat  0  0  0  0  0  
  Ben did not bat  0  0  0  0  0  
  Coleman did not bat  0  0  0  0  0  
 Extras (b 3, lb 4, w 13, nb 0) 20    
 TOTAL (35.0 Overs) 156-4    
 Fall of wickets:  1-111 [Gear] , 2-123 [Pinsent] , 3-141 [Vasey] , 4-156 [Smallwood]
Bowling O M R W  
 Oliver Haill 7 1 22 1  
 James Smith 7 0 31 0  
 Sammy Purcell 7 0 39 1  
 Jon Webley 3 0 11 0  
 Conrad Chandler 3 0 13 0  
 Matt Callender 2 0 14 0  
 Adam Long 3 0 14 1  
 Kurt Rademaker 3 1 10 1  
Pacific innings Runs Mins Balls 4s 6s
  Peter Hollman b Cierson  19  0  0  1  0  
  Kurt Rademaker b Pinsent  43  0  0  7  0  
  Jon Webley b Adam  36  0  0  5  0  
  Adam Long c David b Adam  18  0  0  3  0  
  Conrad Chandler not out  21  0  0  4  0  
  Matt Callender c Ben b Vasey  0  0  0  0  0  
  Sammy Purcell not out  5  0  0  1  0  
  Mark Sams did not bat  0  0  0  0  0  
  Oliver Haill did not bat  0  0  0  0  0  
  James Smith did not bat  0  0  0  0  0  
  Mat Patel did not bat  0  0  0  0  0  
 Extras (b 10, lb 4, w 3, nb 0) 17    
 TOTAL (33.4 Overs) 159-5    
 Fall of wickets:  1-53 [Rademaker] , 2-68 [Hollman] , 3-98 [Webley] , 4-132 [Long] , 5-135
Bowling O M R W  
 Snookes 6 1 38 0  
 Vasey 6 2 23 1  
 Adam 7.4 0 48 2  
 Cierson 7 1 18 1  
 Pinsent 7 1 25 1  

Other matches:
 Sun 11-Jul-2004, Lycee de la Sauque, Won 7 wickets